Apologies in advance!

[lucydales]

Hardy scots...

50°F
People in Southern England turn on the central heating
People in Edinburgh plant out bedding plants

40°F
Southerners shiver uncontrollably
Glaswegians sunbathe on the beach at Largs

35°F
Cars in the South of England refuse to start
People in Falkirk drive with their windows down

20°F
Southerners wear overcoats, gloves and woolly hats
Aberdonian men throw on a t-shirt; girls start wearing mini-skirts

15°F
Southerners begin to evacuate to the continent
People from Dundee swim in the River Tay at Broughty Ferry

0°F
Life in the South grinds to a halt
Inverness folk have the last BBQ before it gets cold

-10°F
Life in the South ceases to exist
People in Dunfermline throw on a light jacket

-80°F
Polar bears wonder if it's worth carrying on
Boy Scouts in Oban start wearing their long trousers

-100°F
Santa Claus abandons North Pole
People in Stirling put on their 'long johns'

-173°F
Alcohol freezes
Glaswegians get upset because all the pubs are shut

-297°F
Microbial life starts to disappear
The cows in Dumfriesshire complain about farmers with cold hands

-460°F
All atomic motion stops
Shetlanders stamp their feet and blow on their hands

-500°F
Hell freezes over
Scotland will support England in the World cup

[zeldalithgow]

Never ;D ;D well we might if we're not playing ;D ;D

[justjordie]

LOL

[Debbie]

Brilliant! Love the bit about the cows complaining. ;D

[olivia]

LOL - brill

[harveydales]

[PonyGirl]

You left out ...

Riders will warm their hands on the warm spots for the mounts.

Poor Daisy. I have done this when my hand has just froze. She looks at me like I am mad. (I am but who is pointing fingers?)

[ccc]

That has had me almost in tears laughing Lucy!!! THANK YOU

[DalesLady]